Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
