i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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