I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize