His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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