redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
