chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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