in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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