oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
