2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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