Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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