You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize