he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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