i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
