Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
