The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I just got carded by a ten year old.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize