I want to have your abortion
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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