Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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