What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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