Apparently you make a good broom.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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