whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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