Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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