I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Green mimosas i think yes
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
