Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize