Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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