I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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