I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
