this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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