we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
