You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
