Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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