I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
