So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
