So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
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