He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I see more hoeing in ur future
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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