Sponge bath it is.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
