im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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