Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize