# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
