how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
