I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
