I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
