I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
