your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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