i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
