Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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