like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
