Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
