Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
