happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My bed smells like the plague
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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