No awkward lesbian experiences without me
one might say we're banned from that church
even my farts smell like vagina
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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