I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
